If I had to pick just one ultimate goal behind my passion for continuing to educate and strengthen my mind/body/spirit it would be my aspiration to become solid. The picture I’m given is of chocolate Easter bunnies. Hollow bunnies crumble at the slightest poke, whereas solid bunnies need a good gnawing to do them in (and even then, it takes time).
We may not be chocolate bunnies, but this analogy has helped me to understand the areas where I am vulnerable and ask myself why. Why do some observations given by others regarding something on our person roll off our backs while others poke right through us, leaving behind a gaping hole? They don’t do it to us; we do it to ourselves. How’s that? They are merely giving an observation. We are choosing whether or not to give it meaning. Believe it or not, it’s always our choice. If you have a strong belief about something regarding yourself that you are sure of, nobody’s observation is going to touch it. They are poking, but they can’t get there because you’re solid. As MC Hammer said: “U can’t touch this.” As a person with disordered eating and body image challenges in her history, I can give you an easy example. Because of the many areas when I began my journey that were weak, it is easy for me to pick one body image area where I was generally solid: my breasts. This is an especially good example, because by society’s standards I would be considered lacking as an A-cup. An A-cup is usually generalized as being “flat-chested”, which I believe to be a misnomer. Small-breasted, yes. Flat? No. But I love my breasts and for the most part, always have. So when negative comments or teasing came about from others regarding my breasts, they didn’t get to me because I loved my breasts just as they were and nothing could sway me from my solid truth: my breasts are magnificent! If I hadn’t known that before breastfeeding my 3 babies, I absolutely knew it after because I was entranced by what they could do. They were miraculous powerhouses of nourishment and the realization of that truth empowered me. Who cared what size they were? They were wondrous parts of my anatomy that fascinated me, and I could truly appreciate the gift that they were. This fascination and my passion regarding encouraging others to love what we HAVE is one I have learned to tone down a bit where it is not welcome. This was not easy for me to get at first because for the life of me I could not understand why a person could not take a compliment about being blessed with big breasts that look so extraordinary and inviting in a swimsuit. But I learned to respect the fact that not everybody wants to talk about their breasts. Go figure! 😉
So how do you get to solid? Start by identifying your solid areas and ask yourself why you are solid in those areas. What brought about the confidence that makes it a “non-pokeable” area? Were you always solid in that area or was it something you worked at in order to achieve this solidity? Identifying what has worked for you in the past is always a good place to start. Why? Because it gets you started! You can adjust your course once you get rolling. As with everything, loving what you already have will point you in the right direction. The same love I had automatically with my breasts, for instance, I could not apply toward my thighs until I stopped thinking about all the things they weren’t and focused on what they were: strong and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound! (okay, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I refuse to rule it out entirely. After all, one of the advantages of small breasts is that it makes jumping wayyyy easier).