“And it’s your own fault because you’re so wishy-washy!” says an exasperated Sally to her big brother Charlie Brown in A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving after he allows Peppermint Patty to steamroll him into hosting a Thanksgiving dinner that he is incapable of delivering on, at least as far as delivering the kind of dinner she’d expected. Charlie Brown is wishy-washy, but he gets a pass because he’s still a child. As far as I know there were no follow-up stories on the adult Charlie Brown, but it’s my hope that since he had such a challenging childhood, he rose to empowered adulthood due to the relentless soul training he endured from situations such as Thanksgiving. And Halloween. And Christmas. And Valentine’s Day. Need I go on? Just as I’ve identified with Sally, my brain so numbed by love that I completely abandon my own pursuits in order to wait in the pumpkin patch all night with my beloved, supporting him in his wait for his vision to manifest while forfeiting my own treats, I’m also like Charlie Brown: I’ve been wishy-washy. Maybe you have been too. It happens. Until you see to it that it doesn’t.
Wishy-washy isn’t exclusively about being stalled in your life due to an inability to tell the Peppermint Pattys of the world NO. Sometimes we’re stalled from not being able to say YES to life due to fear of the unknown. What are the unknowns? I’ll throw a few out and let’s see if any resonate with you. Fear of what other people will think. Fear of being laughed at (or not laughed at if your goal was getting laughs) fear of rejection, fear of making an ass of yourself, fear that you’ll fall short, fear that you’ll disappoint another, fear that you’re not enough. Wait. Back it up. That’s the one. Fear that you’re not enough. Because you see, if you understood that you were enough, you would never be stopped by fear. You don’t cease to feel the fear- hell YES, you’re still going to feel afraid, you just train in not letting it stop you. Consider reframing fear as a CALL TO ACTION, learning to perceive it as excitement that fuels an action you’re meant to take. As I’ve said before, feeling fear is not the same as not having peace with something. Not having peace about something is a sign from deep within (gut) urging you not to proceed. Fear, on the other hand, is a lying voice in your head that attempts to keep you stagnant using intimidation tactics. Where gut un-ease should serve as a red light, choose to see the lying voice of fear as green and hit the gas.
As you’ve no doubt already recognized, there’s more to wishy-washiness than just your yeses and nos. But similar to the extra pounds you may be carrying, your level of wishy-washiness didn’t arrive all at once and it won’t leave that way either. As always, you start with ONE step and you’re led to the next. Your first step in eradicating wishy-washy from your cupboard is to KNOW YOU’RE ENOUGH. If you’re saying to me, “but I’m not enough-that’s the point!” then take my word for it for now and believe it in faith, operating in FakeItTilYouFeelIt mode, doing the work required to bring you to the point where you know like you know like you know that you indeed ARE ENOUGH. I already know it about you. If you’re working on it, it’s just a matter of time before you know it too.