So often in life, I just don’t get it.
You know- the multitude of its that other people appear to be “getting” and moving in the understanding of that I can’t seem to grasp without coming up with a method or workaround that speaks to me, clarifying my directive.
I require a “picture” created in my head, generally derived through stories I find everywhere, such as
- life experiences and/or storytelling (my own and other people’s)
- books
- movies
- music and lyrics
- pictures of any kind and photographs
- additional art in any form
Working from there enables me to make “sense” of things.
I never consciously realized it was something I was doing as much as me finding methods of making sense of things that didn’t make sense to me naturally– making my way wherever I couldn’t see the way.
You know, the more common path, previously paved and used readily by others.
But having first become schooled in the realm of neurodiversity out of necessity due to my son’s ASD diagnosis 25+ years ago, ultimately continuing my education in this area due to genuine interest in the topic and a strong desire for additional information, I would eventually wonder which brain processing variation (neurodiversity) this aspect of my mental wizardry might possibly play into.
ADHD? AuDHD? Apophenia? Hyperempathy? Some new facet of neurospicy yet to be unveiled?
But I decided that at this point in my journey, what did it matter? I’d continue on with an attitude of “Do what you can, with what you’ve got, where you are.” (a motto of Theodore Roosevelt’s credited to Squire Bill Widener of Widener’s Valley, Virginia) unless/until I was led to do otherwise.
If none of this makes sense to you, don’t expect it to. This is my experience. That doesn’t mean it aligns with your experience, or anybody else’s for that matter.
And why should it? Which is actually my point.
If we hadn’t been conditioned to believe that the most typical of methods was the most acceptable of methods, how many additional methods may be found that served numerous people who may not think typically?
And why would typical be the goal in the first place, when historically speaking, atypical methods and modes of thought may often bring about innovation, development, and advancement?
I believe we each have the ability to see through a multitude of lenses when we allow ourselves and others the grace to “not be typical” without judgement, by acknowledging and utilizing the many facets of self that may present differently from the norm.
Differences that when merged together in a collaborative manner of open-minded curiosity regarding possibility, have the power to build bridges of connection, empowering and advancing the collective, rather than walls erected from fear or distrust of one another’s “otherness”.
As Dr. Orna Guralnik reminds us, “The journey is to negotiate otherness.”
But even as I reread and wholeheartedly desire to live those words (and also have them written and displayed where I can easily see and be reminded of them daily) it often feels as though the task in such negotiations is bigger than my human ability to do so.
And this is where our inner coach comes in.
That deeper part of ourselves we can pull from when our human self alone falls short in the depth and breadth of consciousness required to see past any egoic natures that sabotage the flexibility of mind required to see the bigger picture of what we’re experiencing.
What you require of this inner coaching will be individual to you.
That said, we all have the ability to help one another summon and utilize our inner coaches by acquiring the many tools and skills available for doing so, which I’ll be sharing in the next post.
You can’t know which tools you require to do the work until you know what the work is. You can’t know what the work is until you know your why. You can’t know your why until you look more deeply into yourself and ascertain your truths.
You won’t know your truths until you’ve experienced them in a language you understand. A language that speaks to you. That is yours to uncover.
Let’s not get so caught up in the “form” it takes that we miss the message.
LA Holmberg: fit beyond Form 
I welcome your input!