I may have mentioned more than once that I am challenged by my impatience. When I get something that I am sure can help others, I want them to get it too. I want them to get it yesterday in fact. I realize that this is not only unrealistic but also unfair. It has been laid on my heart LOUDLY by my sources that people will get things when they are meant to get them and not a minute sooner, and my role is not in expedition of their revelation, but in (yes, say it with me again because I have to remind myself of the nature of my mission here daily) “encouragement of the emergence of their empowered energy.” Not MY energy forced on them. And that’s not easy, as mine is a fairly forceful energy. And loud. But that’s beside the point. Let’s keep my loud voice out of it. That voice will have its day…
In the meantime, as my work continues I become increasingly frustrated by the sense that I am moving at such a snail’s pace it often feels like I’m not getting anywhere at all. I pick up the collective feeling of dissatisfaction among a large percentage of the world as I go about my business and I want to convey a message of inspiration and yet at the same time, I long to run home and bury my head under a pillow and make the overwhelming magnitude of the project at hand go away. It’s a huge undertaking: spreading a message to a disbelieving audience that obesity, body image, fatness, thinness, diet, health concerns, workouts, scales, etc..etc..blah, blah, blah………..are all a subterfuge for that which is actually hidden in plain sight that they think they need a magic bullet remedy to find (in a certain time period, naturally). I get this because I lived this, but I was blessedly shown another way and I want to offer others access to that information. But it must be an offer, not a demand. And that’s frustrating to me because there is so much needless pain and self-hatred out there that I believe could be eradicated if we are open to unlearning cultivated untruths that we have unconsciously absorbed into beliefs of “what is” rather than questioning why it is. Because when we do question why something is, it is then that we are tapped awake with an answer (which is actually another question) that says, “but IS it?”
So as my work on Fit Beyond Form continues and the information that has been revealed to me continues to fire me up, I am told to settle my impatient ass down and experience the process, understanding that I’m not there yet, because I’M. not. there. yet. Though I wish spreading messages of hope and enlightenment were as easy as sticking my index fingers into a person’s ears and transmitting all the information that’s been given to me to them instantaneously, it doesn’t work that way here and we are limited to what we can say with words. And while I am grateful for the words, and especially those that are given freely to me from above to convey something specific when necessary, they are an extremely limited form of communication. Not to mention slow. Which I suppose is the point, or at least one of them. The other point being the reminder that the world need not wait on me, nor anyone else for a message. The messages are there waiting for you. Ask and you will be shown. You just have to open your eyes and be willing to see. And that’s the part that trips most of us up. Not disbelief that something will indeed be shown to us, but fear of what we’ll do with it once it is.
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